A few days ago, I was driving home from my aunt and uncle’s house. I had just spent the evening with the Harger side of my family. My grandma (G’ma, as she had been lovingly coined when us grandkids were young) had flown in from Florida to do something I can only pray I will never have to do. Something I don’t know if I would ever have the strength to do. She flew home to bury her son.

But as I was driving home, I found myself thanking and praising God for that evening – for how He was moving – for what He was doing in the midst of a terrible situation. I had watched that evening as He penetrated the darkness of death and grief to bring life. Even though there was still sorrow, laughter rang out. Memories long forgotten spilled out and a tangible joy and peace drove back the pain of loss. Like most families, the Harger family has not been without its own family problems over the years. Relationships across the board have been described as tenuous at best. That night though, the walls erected over months and years of disagreement were crumbled. God was unwilling to let the darkness prevail, and even though the loss is still heavy, in that car I could not help but thank Him.

My Uncle Tom did what most of us strive to do with our time on earth – he left his mark. In the lightning protection industry, he was a pillar, a giant. He devoted his life’s work to it. Not just in his day to day business, but he was active in so many lightning protection organizations it is easy to lose count. As I am told, Tom’s advocacy ranged from being active on the United Lightning Protection Association Board of Directors, to writing and forming the National Fire Protection Association 780 standard, and much, much more. For many years, and especially in this last week, I have had countless people tell me what an incredible service Tom did for the industry and how lightning protection would not be what it is today without him.

In all honesty though, that’s just what I’m told. I never experienced that with Uncle Tom. I am not saying a single word of it is untrue, but that just isn’t what I saw personally. I came into the lightning protection industry a little over 10 years ago. As I was stepping up though, Tom was stepping back. I was never on a board of directors at the same time as him and I never got to see him live in action for so many of the things he is accredited with. What I remember and experienced with Tom is kindness and warmth. Every time I saw him, Uncle Tom would stop and talk to me. Even in the midst of a busy conference or party, Tom would make time to see how I was doing. His questions were always genuine as he wanted to know about me and my life. Even when his time was extremely short, lying in a hospital bed the last time I saw him, he asked me how I was doing, he asked about my kids, and even asked how business going. So, my experience isn’t how Tom left his mark on the world, but how he left his mark on me – with an inspirationally outward focus on others I pray I can maintain – and for that I am eternally thankful.

1 John 4:19 – We love first because He first loved us.